Christmas 2008

Christmas 2008
The Kung Fu Carvers

Monday, July 07, 2008

So sad :(

This past Saturday we decided to head over to the pool in Sun Valley for some RnR. We decided to call up Kiernan's best friend to see if he wanted to go and swim then spend the night. Arrangements were made and we met him and his mom at the pool for the exchange. We had lots of fun (it's a cute little pool) and it was not as crowded as we thought it would be. A few hours later we piled into the car and headed home. As we drove the road between Sun Valley to Golden Valley we started talking with the boys about school starting (today the 7th) and as we drove past the North Valleys High School we talked about how they both would be going to that school.
I hear this quiet voice in the back seat,"I don't know if I'll be going to that school. We might be moving." I think there was a collective WHAT?! from Mike, Kiernan and myself. He followed up with that his parents are getting a divorce. "They've been fighting a lot lately." A few seconds went by and I said, "Honey, just because your parents are fighting doesn't mean they're getting divorced." I hear his quiet voice again, "My dad told me they were getting divorced. We're (meaning his mom and brother too) living with (I think he said his uncle) now because they're separated and dad is living at the house by himself."
My heart was aching and my eyes filled up with tears. I think I heard him say something about how he didn't know what school he was going to end up at. I wish I could have thought of something to say to him but how do you reassure an 8 year old that it's going to be ok? In hindsight I wish I had thought to say to him, "No matter what happens, it's not your fault" or something!
That night I talked to Kiernan for awhile about it because we were both pretty bummed out by it. Both Mike and I come from divorced families (heck, in my case a two divorce family) and it just really hit home. I remember when my mom was a single parent raising two kids and I know it was hard. A big difference with them is that his dad is super involved with the boys and will still be in his life as a presence. My dad just fell off the face of the planet.

1 comment:

Stacie said...

Bummer. I can relate. There have been so many divorces in my family that my family tree is more like a crooked hedgerow. Kids internalize that stuff so much, too. :(

Poor kiddo. Perhaps it is time for Kiernan to learn the art of letter writing so he can keep in touch with his friend? I managed to hold on to some great people that way through some really major ups and downs.