Christmas 2008

Christmas 2008
The Kung Fu Carvers

Monday, February 05, 2007

And the follow up

Yesterday, Mike went over and talked to the dad next door (he has twin boys just slightly older than Kiernan). And here's the rest of the story.

The twins, Kiernan and the crazy grandson were all playing together on the trampoline in the twin's backyard. The grandson got angry about something and started strangling the smaller of the two twins while on the trampoline. Kiernan ran over and kicked the grandson in the side and he let go of the boy. The twins ran inside and told their dad who then came out and kicked the grandson out of the yard. The grandson then turned to Kiernan and said, "Let's go Kiernan." And so he did.

The two came back over to our house and into the backyard. At this point, we were unaware that anything had happened and the two of them coming through the house to play in the backyard was not unusual.

Trash started coming over the fence and the dad next door came to the fence and yelled at the grandson to stop throwing trash over. Somewhere in his yelling at him, he said something to the effect of "You're done here!" or "I'm through with you!" <> The grandson took this to mean that he was not going to be allowed to return to their house ever and knew he had lost two friends (including the one he had tried to strangle). If he had lost his friends then he didn't want to live anymore. After having watched a man hang himself on the History Channel's "Haunted Motels" he decided he was going to hang himself too.
Here's where it gets a little convoluted. The two boys went back to the swing. Somewhere in the timeline of events the grandson picked up a stick and swung it at my son like a baseball bat--knocking him off the swing (Kiernan has said both in the head then later in the stomach). When Kiernan got back up off the ground, the grandson attempted to pick Kiernan up and hang HIM from the swingset first. We have two swings and a trapeze type swing on our set. The grandson was attempting to hang MY SON on the trapeze bar. Kiernan got free but aparently fell onto the ground. In the meantime, the grandson had twisted the trapeze bar around to make it tighten up then stuck his own head in it. Somewhere during this attempt he lost consciousness and fell to the ground. On the other side of the fence were the twins, watching. What they saw was Kiernan on the ground and Nick attempting to hang himself and falling to the ground. Those two high tailed it to their dad. That's where we got the story that they had both attempted to hang themselves.

I called my son's school counselor today and talked to her about it. It was a good talk and I felt better. She agreed that this was a person that Kiernan could no longer be in contact with and said to keep him busy for the next 2-3 weeks (so that the absence of the grandson isn';t as noticable). She also told me to call Child Protective Services (CPS). So I called them. CPS only deals with child protective issues within the family. I would have to call the police and file a report. I just wasn't prepared to do that. In the meantime, his counselor is going to touch base with him tomorrow and ask him a few questions about his friendship with the grandson and to reaffirm the toxicity of their relationship.

I'm sure this isn't over.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

What was almost my worst day ever

For those of you who have been following the saga of the our next door neighbors grandson, then this is what may have been his final chapter.

My son, Kiernan, and the grandson were playing in our backyard this afternoon for quite awhile. I didn't hear from them for awhile, which can be disturbing when it's this boy over playing (as you never know what he's got running through his head). The two came busting in through the back door talking really fast and the grandson went out the front door. I looked at Kiernan quizically and asked, "What's going on?" He came back with something like the grandson was throwing trash from our yard (broken toys and what not) into our neighbors yard (the neighbors on the other side---not the boy's grandparents). Well the neighbor had come out and yelled at them and now the neighbor was on his way to gramma's house to tell them what had happened.

Mike (my husband) thought that sounded pretty odd (to get that mad over toys being thrown over the fence) so he headed next door too. Not long after Mike comes back and heads right to Kiernan. "Were you both throwing trash over the fence?" Kiernan nodded his head. Then Mike said, "What is this about you two handing yourselves from the swingset until you passed out!?" I jumped up to look at them. By now Kiernan was crying and you really couldn't get anything out of him. I couldn't even tell you what the conversation was after that but it included Mike asking Kiernan if he even knew what it meant to be dead. My brain just froze and tears sprang to my eyes. Mike sent him to his room (Kiernan was bawling at this point) and went back outside. I was bawling myself at this point. I called my mom to tell her what happened and was just sobbing. While still on the phone, I glanced out the door and saw that Mike, our neighbor and the boy's gramma and mom had him surrounded in the street. He was standing in the center staring at the ground with his hands in his pockets. It took me every ounce of strength not to race out the front door and strangle him.

I got off the phone with my mom and headed upstairs. I could hear Kiernan crying before I even got to the door. He was sobbing uncontrollably with his back against the wall. I tried to pull him into a hug but he was too upset. I tried to explain to him over and over what he had almost done. When he finally calmed down we talked about it a little more but really, he was more upset that he wasn't going to be able to spend the night at Nick's house then the fact that he could have died. I told him, "Don't EVER do anything that would take you away from me. I would cry for the rest of my life from missing you." And I left the room.

Mike came in a little later and told me the whole story. After the neighbor had yelled at the boys for throwing trash, he ended it with something to the effect of "I've had enough" or "that's the last straw." Well, the boy took this to mean that he wasn't allowed to play with the neighbor's kids anymore. He was so upset that they couldn't be his friends anymore that he decided to hang himself. The neighbor was watching to see if the boys were going to throw more trash and saw the attempted hanging. Folks, this is a 9 year old boy on medication and in therapy. But It was not my son who had tried to hang himself. Kiernan insists that his friend had hit him with a stick hard enough to throw him off the swing.

A 7 1/2 year old doesn't know what it means to die forever. His idea of dying is to reboot the game and start over. Right now he's perfectly content to get ready to watch movies with me for "Movie Night." If you had asked me before, I wouldn't have said that a 9 year old would have known what it means to die forever. Now? I don't know.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Funny song

My son taught this song to me (sung to the tune of "Oh Tannenbaum")

Oh Tom the Toad, Oh Tom the Toad
Why are you lying in the road?

Oh Tom the Toad, Oh Tom the Toad
Why are you lying in the road?

Did you not see the truck ahead?
Now you're lying

Oh Tom the Toad, Oh Tom the Toad
Why are you lying in the road?

(You can always swap out the name "Tom" for other names like your dog, cat, baby name it!)