Tuesday, March 18th

Today is the 11th anniversary of the worst day of my life. 11 years and it doesn't hurt less. I have a wonderful life with my hubby and two babies but it doesn't hurt less.
I went out of town this last weekend. I wasn't a food saint but I also didn't go crazy. I didn't gain or lose so that's a victory for me.
The voice on my head is using my cheat weekend as a jumping off point for the non-stop negotiations that always come when I try and get healthy. Nothing bad happened and I ate 90% cocoa chocolate. So, if nothing bad happened then I can get away with a little more, right? What if I have some every day? It won't be bad. Constant fighting! Constant exhausting fighting!!!!